My life

Holy Crap it has been a long time since I've blogged about anything. But oh wait!!! No one is even reading this so who really cares right?! Which makes me wonder, why am I writing this in the first place? And the answer is: I have no clue. Just need someone to talk to and right now its the computer. How sad is my life. Speaking of that dramedy, i'm going on a mission. I'm going to California Roseville. I leave August 26th so in about two and a half weeks. Pretty darn stoked, won't lie. Missions are great. I love the Church. I mean, if I didn't, why would I spend two years of my life?! I'm not that stupid. I just hope I can share with at least one person my love of the gospel and help save their life and their soul. So thats whats happening in my neck of the woods (Thanks Al Roker).

Weather

Really?! What is with the weather this year?! I don't know if I'm over anxious for summer or something, but it seems to me that this weather is a little out of control. I feel like Mother Nature has over-stepped her bounds and must be controlled. I realized we're in utah, a very loving state, which is why I think Mother Nature feels she can just do whatever she wants. But I think its time to take a stand. Now your probably thinking, what can we do? I'll tell you what we can do. Just ignore her. Lets give Mother Nature the silent treatment. I'm certain she only keeps "giving" us these storms because she likes the attention she gets. So I call for a mass silence on anything pertaining to weather. Now this may seem quite over the top, but i'm serious, I know it'll work. We need the all weather persons to be silenced and put in solitary. Every weather section of the paper to be burned immediately. However, she will just not go alone. Finally, we need to found a weather station in the mountains. At some campsite in the Uintah Mountains. Maybe trial lake. And they should talk about the snow they get and that is it. Only weather and complete praise of Mother Nature. That way, she'll get drawn to the mountains and just leave us alone. I think that is a great idea. Mother Nature is just another person like you or I, so we should manipulate her so.

Free Things

I love free things. I am like the biggest advocate of free things. Seriously, nothing bothers me more than when I have the chance to something free but then miss it. For any reason, i'm just bothered. I think giving away free things is the best idea ever. Free is probably the most loved word in the english language. Everyone loves when they get something free, regardless of what it is. I promise, you put a sign in your yard saying "Free Air", you will have people inquiring about it within 30 minutes. I don't even think they see the second word seeing what they get, they just know its free. I think a trigger goes off in their brain thinking, "FREE!!!! 'What is it thats free?' I DON'T CARE, ITS FREE!!!!" Like literally, can you think of anytime people pass up free things? Even if its bad, people consider it because its free. Free drugs? Well, i'm not into that sorta thing....but it is free....I know that crosses all your minds. Like at a basketball game, they throw out free towels, shirts, balls. Do you know what you do with them? Put them on your floor for awhile then throw them out during spring cleaning. Your sitting there and they come out with mini basketballs. You stand up, spilling the four you already have, just to catch another one. It is ridiculous really.

Practical Jokes

So I've always been a joker. I like making people laugh and I think people should just laugh more. I think everyone should just not let things bug them, get over it, and laugh about it. Since I'm a joker, I love practical jokes. Those are like the king of all jokes. If you have a a practical joke that takes a while to plan out and even longer to execute, but works like a charm, I look up to you greatly. I love thinking of practical jokes. I'm never sure how the jokes will end, so I don't do some of them just because I don't know the law so I could end up in prison only because I didn't know it was illegal. Now don't worry I don't do things that I know are illegal, like a start a brush fire right in front of a house or anything. I also avoid, like the plague, jokes that the sole purpose is to hurt someone. Thats not who I am, so I don't do it. Those aren't jokes, thats just mean. But anyway, today I was walking into school and I saw a cop and he pulled into a parking space in front of me. As I walked by I really wanted to stop in front of his car, look at him and then just make a break for it, like I had done something bad and I wanted him to chase me. And when he ultimately caught me (yes he was a fit cop) i'd just laugh because I didn't do anything wrong. It would be really awesome if at the same time like someone stole a book or something so people were shouting at the cop because something went wrong. But in the end, I didn't do anything and just acted like it. I think that would be awesome.

Boom Roasted!

So one of my favorite shows is The Office. There was an episode where the main character got roasted. I love that idea. So if I know you, you may be roasted. Its all in fun, and i'm just making some jokes. I don't mean it. Don't kill me.

Patrick, you're short and your son is a failure. Boom, roasted.
Kiana, you married Patrick. Boom, roasted.
Meredith, your pregnant and your car never works. Boom, roasted.
Abby, i've dated more than you and your boyfriend looks like a muppet. Boom, roasted.
Cindy, you go to BYU. Boom, roasted.
Hannah, you go to BYU-ID, even worse. Boom, roasted.
Sara, you cry more than my mom. Boom, roasted.
Tara, you date only scumbags. Boom, roasted. (Though I wish you the best of luck in the future)
Liz, the only difference between you and Hellen Keller is that she's famous. Boom, roasted.
Mom and Dad, you are murderers of love. Boom, roasted.

Thank you all for your support. More roasts may come

My first Blog

So I was sitting here at school with 20 min to kill and I had like seven random thoughts and I had no one to tell them to. So I had to start a blog. Wanna know my seven thoughts? Well these appeared in no particular order, but here they are:
1) I need to start a blog.
2) I'm going to be in school for like six more years + two years for my mission. Dang!!
3) I could really use a pizza right about now. (Yes, it was 9:30 in the morning, but seriously, who cares anymore?)
4) Pancakes.
5) I need to be famous. Yeah, that is kinda selfish of me. but seriously, i'd be an awesome famous person. I'd do all these sweet things like fundraisers with all my famous friends to benefit people. Then lots of awesome people would read my blog.
6) Who invented the blog? Because I bet right now they are sitting in their home thinking about how awesome he is for inventing it. He probably wishes that he would've patented the idea. Because instead of his small suburb home, he could be in a mansion. Lots of people blog and love the idea of the blog. Heck, i'm one of them.
7) I wonder how many soft tacos I could eat in 3 minutes. I mean, if there is one thing I love, its a good soft taco. I can eat those by the pound, so i'm just curious about how many I can eat.

So there you have it, welcome to my life. I promise, you won't be disappointed by these posts. And if you do, you've got a serious humor problem.